Ms. Frey thought she could continue to work while in intensive care unit

Ms. Frey had her computer brought to the hospital to work. However, she soon found out that she was not able to work through the orders . This shows an overestimation of one's own abilities and resilience.

"If I had a vice, I would put my head in a vice"

Ms. Frey suddenly got a severe headache in the morning. She immediately vomited painkillers. The description of wanting to put her head in a vice makes it clear that she felt extreme pressure which she wanted to counteract somehow.

Ms. Frey forgets a few things now and then

Ms. Frey is not sure if she forgets more since the brain haemorrhage, or if she pays more attention.

Ms. Frey had to turn down some orders after the haemorrhage

Ms. Frey works independently as an illustrator and thought she could already continue her work during the intensive stay. She quickly realised how difficult it was to keep up with simple routine tasks and cancelled the assignment. Even weeks later, her work took significantly more time than usual.

Ms. Frey concentrates on what is good for her

Ms. Frey tries to distance herself from stressful contacts and focuses on positive aspects of life.

It gives Ms. Frey strength when she carries out professional assignments

Ms. Frey only became aware of the seriousness of her illness in retrospect. As an illustrator, it helps her to dedicate herself to her work.

It was "insanely loud"

For Ms. Frey, the noise was the worst; especially the regular changing of the rubbish bags.

During the lockdown you could not see the faces of the staff

During the Corona pandemic, the staff wore face masks and usually glasses so that their faces and expressions could not be seen. Especially in the first phase of the pandemic, no one was used to this sight.

Ms. Frey felt patronised

Ms. Frey did not want to go to the rehabilitation clinic, even though she was already registered. She felt patronised in her decision by the doctors treating her. Only when she demanded several talks and tears flowed, was her request granted.

Ms. Frey walked to the hospital

Ms. Frey has gaps in her memory from the day of the bleeding event. The symptoms occurred during the first Corona wave. There was no other issue at the time. Ms. Frey thought the virus had got her. It was not until the next day, on the advice of her partner, that she called the family doctor and walked to the nearest hospital.

Ms. Frey is grateful not to have been asked about her will to live

Ms. Frey justifies her good progress with her disease by saying that, due to her ignorance, she had good thoughts which had a positive effect on her health. If she had been asked about her will to live, she would only have realised the extent of her disease. Her fears could then have negatively influenced her recovery.

"I could go home now"

Ms. Frey could not fully assess the risk of complications and felt restored after the operation. Her greatest wish was to be released home. The two-week period of being confined to bed is an important part of the therapy, in order to prevent complications such as post-operative bleeding.

Neighbouring patient indirectly influences the decision

Ms. Frey made a very conscious decision not to go to a rehabilitation clinic after observing the occupational therapy measures at the neighbouring bed. She transferred the therapy to her own condition and classified this measure as superfluous.

Between trust and paternalism

Ms. Frey only agreed to the operation after a trusting discussion with the doctor. This illustrates how important the discussions are in order to agree to an operation. During the course of the disease (see paternalism), she felt patronised by the doctors and excluded from the decision of the follow-up therapies. Her willingness to cooperate decreased and she discontinued the therapy.

Self-positioning through demarcation

Ms. Frey positions herself by opposing others. In this demarcation, she decides when rehabilitation is necessary.

Insecurity determines the conduct of the conversation

Ms. Frey describes the loss of her self-confidence. She no longer fully trusts her memory and feels more insecure in conversations.

Positive thinking

Ms. Frey is also convinced that thoughts have an effect on the course of the disease, which is why she rejects the complete information.