A4: So when you first said this, these gaps, I had the impression that it bothers you a lot. Because there's just a piece of the puzzle missing in this picture. There's something missing and you had no control over that time. P4: That's bad anyway. A4: That's what I felt there. But the fact that your teeth were brushed and you were cared for, I know that. That took place. P4: That's good. Yes, well, it's just a memory gap, and I think it's just a matter of trusting that everything has gone right. You can imagine or think up things that are not at all realistic. What happened in those 24 hours a day. That's what makes me, when you don't know anything at all.... How was I taken care of? You know, all those things that I actually care about. The hole, that's what bothers me. That I can remember what was up there for two days at the most, and nothing else. Nothing else. That makes trouble for me. I1: And you said earlier about having no control. P4: Yes, you give up control when you have an operation. And I am actually a bit of a control freak. Yes, you just have to say that, that's part of my character. And then to have this confidence that everything went right, that's what I miss. I probably still miss that today, I can't say it any other way.And I can't put it any other way, I wouldn't know how to at the moment. Well, let's stay with that. A4: In retrospect, do you still have the feeling of being at the mercy of this situation? P4: Yes, of course, you are at the mercy.